24 Weeks!

Here I am at 24 weeks and feeling quite nervous, emotional and thankful. The eve of 24 weeks in my first pregnancy brought with it a night of darkness as our power had still not been restored. Hubby and I ended up spending the night at my mom's. It was there, during dinner, that My Girl, still in my womb, was very active. I commented that if felt like, "she's kicking my cervix" - now what in the world does that feel like? As a first time expectant mom, those were the words I used to describe the sensation.

Shortly after dinner, I decided it was time to start the the over-the-counter yeast infection treatment the doctor suggested. I made the observation to my mother before heading off to bed that, "it won't stay in" ... "it just keeps sliding out"... "as if it's being pushed" - it was the suppository I was referring to. Hmmm, hindsight once again...

The next day (equated to today, 24 weeks exactly and a Thursday) we had the promise from the electric company that our power would be restored. In anticipation of this, I decided it was a good idea to clean out my spoiled refrigerator. With no power for almost 48 hours, everything had to go. So I grabbed a heavy-duty black garbage bag and started filling it up. This is one of those moments I regret. For the final days of my pregnancy, the thought that slinging that bag over my shoulder, lugging it through my kitchen to the garage and heaving into the super-big garbage can, haunted me as though my actions caused my baby to literally fall out of me. In retrospect, with a calm, level head, I know that it was not the cause. My cervical issues were becoming worse throughout the week and while this action may have accelerated things, it didn't bring them on.

I do recall after taking care of my rotting food, that I felt the need to "nest". I was organizing and cleaning things that ordinarily would not have gotten my attention. Little did I know what the next morning would bring...

Back to present day, 24 weeks with Baby Boy. The thankfulness comes with the recognition that I am at a different place this time around. I had an appointment yesterday with Dr. C and my cervix remains long and closed. I am almost 100% certain that if my cervix were evaluated in the same manner as it was yesterday at 24 weeks during my first pregnancy, the observations would be quite different. I am grateful for the peace of mind seeing an unchanged cervix over the past eight weeks brings.

My appointment yesterday was a good one. I got to enjoy another solo trip to the Perinatal office. My blood pressure remains low and there was actually no weight gain for me this week. Funny, considering all those donuts I indulged on earlier in the week.

When Dr. C came in, I told him that I experienced some contractions the night before. Yes, I was certain, these were actual uterine-tightening contractions. They occurred as I was settling into bed and there were only a few of them. He asked how active the baby was at the time. I explained that he was very active, moving in his own distinct "rolling" fashion. I confessed that his movements are somewhat concerning to me as the sensation is a strange one. And along with the strange sensations comes an active imagination that he is somehow burrowing his way through my c-section. Dr. C explained how rigorous movements on behalf of Baby Boy can cause my uterus to contract as he moves it from its natural state of rest. It made sense.

The part that I really appreciated was the fact that instead of telling me no way Baby is coming through my lower uterine segment, he SHOWED me! He took his time to view the lower part of my uterus before checking my cervical length. He also printed some photos for me of head-down Baby Boy sucking on his toes.

We discussed the Procardia and decided that since it wasn't eliminating my "crampy" feeling, I should just stop taking it. It seems as though what I am experiencing could be chalked up to "normal pregnancy stuff" but he agreed, because of my history, that we can't be too lax in that assumption. He explained how weekly appointments is pretty hard-core monitoring and it is unlikely anything will slip by unnoticed. It was also agreed that since my irritability isn't causing any cervical changes, unless the sensations I feel change or get much worse, it is safe to say that they are benign. Now if I can just remind myself of this in the midst of an "episode", I'll be just fine.

So today at 24 weeks, I got my 9th Progesterone shot. As Kim was drawing up the solution, she reminded me that I will need more as there is only enough for one more injection. I told her that it is a mental thing and that I cannot order more until what I have is used up. I know it's superstitious of me but I just can't help it.

My emotions have been at their height this week, something I hope will subside in the near future. Tomorrow will be especially difficult as that was the day I began my hospital bed rest. Actually, the next five days are all significant days in the birth story of My Girl. I plan on connecting with them emotionally as best I can in hopes of easing some of the raw pain still felt when I think back to that time in our lives.